Chris Babayans

An identity that has been adopted by me since birth and has changed with me as I grow is Chris Babayans.The name was given to me at birth, and the characteristics of the character have been growing since. Inside my mind is a creativity factory  because that's how I see things, very creatively. From the age of five I think up to 11 I played in evrey single sport. Ranging from baseball, basketball, football, soccer, bowling, chess, professional poker, and car racing none of them really stuck to me.

The one thing that changed in my life during that time was picking up the skateboard and meeting new friends. Letting skating with friends consume my time for physical activity I was constantly exhausted from the heat running up and down the streets of the San Fernando Valley.

During those times I went through a lot of experiences. Starting at elementary school, moving to middle school, meeting friends losing friends events passing, continuing through high school and continuing up to this moment, the only experience that has stuck to me is riding my skateboard. Regardless of what shape it was how fast its wheels were it was mine. It has been with me through everything, and it will continue to be with me through everything for I will never again let myself forget the feeling of freedom dropping into a bowl and riding it out.

Identity Essay

Babayans, Christopher

Identity

English 115

30, November, 2011

Identity

The Glass Castle was a well written story about a woman who grew up to become a writer at a major publishing company in New York and, everything that happened in between starting from birth. In her memoirs published in “Convergences”, Judith Ortiz Cofer presents two short passages, one titled “Silent Dancing” and the other “Lessons of the Past” both  of which provide insight into her past. The similarity shared between the story of Cofer and Jeanette Walls, is that they present their past, and we , the reader can make visible dissertations about how those events shaped their present self.

In Silent Dancing, Judith Cofer, presents many memories that shaped her to be who she is today. She begins with a scene where her father is portrayed as a Navy man who received stable, steady and adequate money but was home less often than he was not. The paychecks that he brings have purchased his family a room in El Building, which was the name of the apartment complex they resided in. The building had many luxuries including running water, electricity, and enough rooms for everyone to sleep. Having said herself, Judith Coffer, states that their greatest luxury in El Building was having a television set. Being born in a single family house in Puerto Rico shaped her reaction to American life clearly, for if she had been born in America, she would probably have had a Television set growing up, and all the luxuries which Americans consider standard. In her identity, is now the notion, that she lived a privileged childhood.

In Coffer’s memoir, Lessons of The Past, she presents many memories. One of which are included in the bunch is her father coming home boring silk pajama gifts and iron cribs,  people filling their house to welcome him. But then things changed and her father stopped coming home. Coffer was able to hear her mother cry from the kitchen, and she was stuck waiting alone learning to count in Spanish for her father to come home. What Coffer learned from the event in her past is very clear for she even stated herself. “who liked his girls smart, who didn’t like cry babies – with a new lesson, learned well.” Characteristics that identify her were shaped here. The characteristics that her father did not like were those of a weak minded person (hence the term cry baby), and smarts. Knowing the characteristics that her father strove to suppress and strengthen, she consciously applied herself to achieve these characteristics’ of identity.

Cofer presents many memories from her time living in El Building and one of them is her memory of the heater pipes which ran vertically through all the rooms in the complex. She remembers playing with them trying to play tunes and seeing if others will respond to her but she was greeted by a spanking shortly after. Having been spanked has given her a reminder and instinctual urge not to play tunes on the water heater. The memory formed to give her identity the aspect of not wanting to play tunes on that water heater or maybe even a broader range of water heaters.

The Glass Castle has many instances where single events shaped occurrences in the future as well as the cognitive process delivering the identity to the main character, including having a father tied by alcoholism as a chronic event. In one scene Jeanette visits her uncle to take a shower at his house and is touched inappropriately. Jeanette told her mother what happened with hesitation. Her mother felt sympathy for Jeanette’s uncle saying that he is a deprived and lonely man, but she also taught her daughter to accept the past, be strong about it, and continue on with your life. Jeanette also took it upon herself not to visit her Uncle without special circumstances present. The events all linked to this one event had many results. The first is the immediate response to being touched sexually by her uncle. She categorized instantaneously that her uncle is a pervert, which can lead to a broader assumption that all Uncles, or even men in general, are out to get her. Following that her mother further shaped her identity by adding the characteristic of being able to move on from the past in a strong manner. The third identity shaping reaction possible from this event could be a hatred toward her mother. Having sided with the offender and Jeanette being the offended, she could possibly see her mother in a less then fully illuminated light for the rest of her life because her mother paired with the offender.

The Glass Castle also had a touch to The Walls’ childhood that I could not imagine. Having been born and raised in the San Fernando Valley and living here all my life leaving only to travel, I can not comprehend how difficult it was for the Walls children to have moved so many times. Countless times did they move from town to town in their beat up car to escape bill collectors and the like. Having an alcoholic father that could not keep a job to pay the bills often led to acquiring things for his family through methods left unknown.

From each book is presented separate instances where lives of young women have been shaped by events in the past. Cofer has had her identity shaped by events in the past and she only presents a few to us. The first was the spoils that her father was able to purchase with his Navy check. The money went above and beyond anything they had in Puerto Rico and even above and beyond those in El Buidling for they were very fortunate to have a television set. From her move in at El Building, she could identify herself to have had a luxurious past.  Another aspect of her past attributing to her identity was her fathers favoring of strong characteristics. He did not like cry babies, and like smart girls. Cofer picked up on the traits her father wanted her to pick up on, and I fear if her father would have been someone else she could possibly not have picked up on those traits. So because her father played a role in her life and not another, her identity can be identified as a smart, non-crybaby.

From Cofer’s Silent Dancing memoir, she presents a scene where she is spanked for playing on the water heater. Psychologically, this presents a negative conditioning associated with playing tunes on water heaters. Theoretically, she should never want to play tunes on a water heater, and that characteristic is now a part of her identity. ­

In The Glass Castle Jeanette Walls went through a severe amount of harshities in her childhood that nobody, child or not, should have to withstand. Her father was a hot headed alcoholic who routinely got out of hand. Her life constantly moved from town to town, various times throughout the story because her father would get into trouble with the locals. She was molested by her uncle, and her mother took her uncles side, but also taught Jeanette a great lesson.

One being shaped by the past and how one perceives and responds to the events is the philosophy I will live and die by. When a person sees an ice cream truck for the first time and the moment they walk up to it they get flames shot at them, they are going to remember, that in the future, ice cream trucks shoot flames out the window, regardless of if the statement holds true for a lengthy period of time, the statement will be held true for a period immediately after the initial incident. Myself having remembering an incident where driving fast seemed fun, has had my identity take it upon itself to drive rather quickly in the permissible times.

Works Cited

 Cofer, Judith O. "Lessons of the Past." Convergences. 3rd ed. New York/Boston: Bedford/St. Martins, 2009. Print.

 Cofer, Judith O. "Silent Dancing" Convergences. 3rd ed. New York/Boston: Bedford/St. Martins, 2009. Print.

 Walls, Jeannette. The Glass Castle: a Memoir. New York: Scribner, 2005. Print.

The Perks of Your Past

In comparison to Walls' memoir of the "Glass Castle", Stephen Chbosky's novel "The Perks of Being a Wallflower" was about how the past subconsciously makes you who you are.


The novel, "The Perks of Being a Wallflower", is about a freshmen in high school named Charlie who is going through his awkward stages of adolescence. Throughout the story, he is seen as the weird kid in school. He is also seen as a wallflower which means he's shy and introspective but very intelligent. Charlie then encounters struggles and experiences that most high school kids face such as drugs, first relationships, and alcohol. Although most teenagers enjoy the roller coaster ride of high school, Charlie has a different perspective and seems nervous about everything.  He had also been very upset from his past, because his favorite Aunt, whom he always mentions in the book, had died and his best friend had committed suicide. When he falls in love with his best friend and she tries to make a sexual move on him, he starts to cry without having a clue why. He ends up in a hospital and the nurses find out what Charlie's problem is. When he was  younger, he had been raped by his Aunt whom he loved so much which is the result to him being antisocial and having post traumatic disorder. Charlies feelings and thoughts have been revolved about someone who sexually molested him and that created his identity to become different than others.


In comparison to Charlie and Walls story, their past represented the way they shaped out to be. Jeanette Walls became a tough woman due to her past family relationship issues and Charlie became a teenager who had to overcome post traumatic disorder.



Parents' History

Ever since the disintegration  of my parents' marriage last year, I've had a different perspective on how I'm going to settle with someone for a lifetime. After almost twenty years of being married, my parents finally decided that it was the end. It was easy for them to move on but as their child, I was lost. They seemed happy together and we were all a perfect family but the split with my parents made me a stronger person. On the contrary, I don't seek for a romance love story anymore. I developed an identity after my parents' divorce, in which It was hard for me to trust someone and relationships are hard to keep. My parents' past will always have a small part of me. Similar to Walls in "The Glass Castle", parents are involved largely in someone's life. The past history can always result to the change of someone's thoughts, just as mine did when it comes to marriage.

When History Becomes Identity

“In Every conceivable manner, the family is link to our past, bridge to our future”. Author Alex Haley’s quote conveys how a person’s family history takes an enormous role in their life and what they shape up to be later in the future. The history of what occurs in a family creates a natural identity to most individuals because of traumatizing experiences, painful memories, or maybe just a small reminiscence. In Jeanette Walls’ memoir, “The Glass Castle”, Walls develops her strong willed identity due to her family’s past of struggles and differences from other families. In comparison to “The Glass Castle,” Judith Ortiz Coefer’s, “Silent Dancing”, collects the memories of how Coefer’s cultural experiences shaped her to become a woman who is proud and powerful of her ethnic background.  Jeanette Walls has demonstrated that her present has been captured by the recollection of the false hope and destructiveness her dysfunctional parents went through. Both Walls and Coefer have shaped up characteristics because of their family’s circumstances.

In “The Glass Castle”, Walls lives her childhood fulfilled with disappointment and broken promises as she moves around her whole life because of bills her parents never paid. The failure of her family turns her into a determined woman, who strives to live the opposite of how she was living all through her youth. Although Walls’ tone is interchangeably neutral throughout the memoir, she still has the mentality in which she wants to move away to New York to live a different lifestyle. The influences of her family develop life lessons for Walls and that becomes a part of her identity. Even though Walls lived in shabby homes with ragged clothes, Walls was taught not to be ashamed of her family and the things she could not afford. ‘”We can’t keep dumping garbage out there”, I said., “What are people going o think? “Life’s too short to worry about what other people think,” Mom said. “Anyway, they should accept us for who we are”’ (Walls, 157). Toward the end of the novel, Walls realized that she needed to stop avoiding the questions being asked about her mother and just learn to hold on to her past. Even as she becomes a successful writer, she does not forget the things her parents had taught her, which reminds her of the person she has always been.

Being raised improperly by her family, Walls was hardly taken care of by her parents. Her mother disliked having the responsibility to take care of children, and her father drank heavily. All the features of her parents turned Walls into a responsible tough cookie. Taking care of her younger siblings and herself meant that Walls had to become an adult at an early age. For example, when she was three years old, she was caught on fire while cooking for herself and her mother was calm about the whole situation. Walls’ parents basically expected her to “suck it up” to learn how to handle situations gone wrong. As Walls grew up in New York, she had to learn how to deal with bullies because her own parents and entire childhood made her deal with bullies. “I got jumped a number of times. People were always telling me that if I was robbed, I should hand over my money rather than risk being killed. But I was darned if I was going to give some stranger my hard-earned c ash, and I didn’t want to become known in the neighborhood as an easy target, so I always fought back. Sometimes I won, Sometimes I lost” (Walls, 248).  Even as an adult, Walls learned to be street smart and was even able to take care of herself in a foreign state like New York.

Not only did Walls’ childhood and family experiences shape up her character, but Judith Coefer’s family history from her own memoir “Silent Dancing”, also shaped up Coefer’s individuality. As a Puerto Rican moving to New Jersey, she developed an influence of story telling due to her family’s historical culture. “It became my father’s obsession to get out of the barrio, and thus we were never permitted to form bonds with the place or with the people who lived there. Yet El Building was a comfort to my mother, who never got over yearning for la isla. She felt surrounded by her language: The walls were thin, and voices speaking and arguing in Spanish could be heard all day. Salsas blasted out of radios turned on early in the morning and left on for company” (Coefer, 70). Coefer develops the comfort her mother felt while living in a cultural environment and grows on that. She even states that, “Negotiating life between two cultures, American and Puerto Rican”, informs sensibilities as a writer.” Also like how Walls from “The Glass Castle”, is accustomed to living in an environment where she is different from others.

Both Walls and Coefer grew up to live in different conditions with their families and that ended up shaping their lives as they grew up. Jeanette Walls story shows how much of a strong woman her past made her become, as well as how much of a proud Puerto Rican woman Coefer is, considering the challenges of facing a new culture in her past. Identities are depicted by what people went through, whether they choose to follow the paths of the past or whether they want to be different from their history, someone’s identity is shaped up by their experiences. Although Walls wanted to live a separate and adaptable life unlike her parents, “The Glass Castle” conveys that the occurrences of her family made her the famous writer she is now. Even as a child, she also maintained loyalty to her family and having loyalty depicts her personality, because the past shaped her to become someone who was devoted to her family. Also, Judith Coefer’s memoir represents the memories of her past and how she titles herself to be a bicultural woman despite being different from everyone else. A person’s family experiences will always have some kind of effect of them, whether they want to forget those past moments. The past will never be forgotten and every experience in life shapes the person someone will become. Walls and Coefer’s memoirs share their piece of identity and the women they shaped up to be after their family lifestyles and their past childhood. Just like Author Haley’s quote, family will always develop a deep personality change in a person, and that creates their identity.

Works Cited

Coefer, Judith. Convergences: Silent Dancing. Boston, New York: 2009. Print.

 Haley, Alex. "Think Exist." . N.p., n.d. Web. 6 Dec 2011. <http://thinkexist.com/quotation/in_every_conceivable_manner-the_family_is_link_to/338986.html>.

url: http://thinkexist.com/quotation/in_every_conceivable_manner-the_family_is_link_to/338986.html

Walls, Jeanette. The Glass Castle. New York: Scribner, 2005.

Photos can be Misleading

This picture can say a lot about Jeannette Walls' identity as well as very little. Just from the image alone, one can say that she is a well off, deep-thinking woman. Without researching or reading her memoir The Glass Castle, no one would have guessed the hardships and rough history behing this elegant photo. Her identity we see today was shaped by the past events such as hiding in a bathroom to eat food people had thrown in the trash.

This is the TRUE identity behind the photo.

This silly video says a lot about myself. I can go on and on about how, but it's pretty obvious what kind of person I am. Seeing this video, would you have expected me to be an all star football player?

Typical jock, or is it?

Looking at this picture of me as a football player, thoughts like "jock," "bully" or even "meathead" come to mind. Becuase of the image portrayed in the picture, my identity was compromised. This image shows an outer shell of my appearance, but because of my history, my identity is quite different than what shows on this image.

iPhone Skateboard

I had been thinking earlier in my media choosing process that I would like to use five pictures but am under the belief that I am limited to four. The iPhone skateboard represents two things which I hold dearly to me. 

Watching commercials for fun I saw a phone commercial and it stated something among the lines that your phone is the only item that's usually always within arms distance of a person. I thought about it and realized that it's true. I do everything on my phone. My music is on it, I browse the web on it, watch YouTube videos on it, text message on it, make phone calls with it, take pictures with it, get directions with it, stocks, weather, make reminds, take notes and everything in between. I have literally allowed my phone to become an unattached part of me.

Seeing as this is true, it is a part of my identity not because of what it is, but what it represents to me. My daily life goes along in my pocket, especially my music which is a whole seperate  form of identitifaction.

I have been skating since I was nine I believe. From the age of nine up until sixteen I spent my days with friends skating the streets of the San Fernando Valley. Spending countless hours riding skateboards and forming the best memories I don't even remember, I can honestly say that skateboarding has a part in my heart. The freedom of expression felt underneath my feet when riding a skateboard is ridiculous. Remembering practicing exercises in grade school to become closer to your board I think they worked. Holding it in one hand I feel like the world is my playground free for expression and play. 

A particular moment that I remember in my life had to do with a skateboard. Riding boards down massive hills while sitting down on them was what we were all about in the sixth grade so we did. One particular road by my house was a sidewalk called Speed Demon. Standing at the top of it about to it on my board for a routin ride I set off. Rolling downthe hill I see  my helmet onthe side of the sidewalk and realize I wasn't wearing it. Thinking if I should or shouldn't put it on I put it on for the hell of it. Flying down the hill like normal I lose control of my board and the nose of my board hammers into a tree. Flying forward with all the velocity f the board still applying to my body, my helmet smashes into the tree and cracks in half.

Standing up and brushing myself off I realize what had happened. I think apply to myself that from now on I should be safe in my dangerous actions, and from that day on, I always take more precautions then I need to usually. Supporting my theory about how the past shapes identity it clearly shows that after realizing what the past had brought upon me, I adjusted my characteristics to ensure that a re occurrence of the event was at as minimum of a possibility as possible.